As Father's Day Approaches, ValueOptions Offers Tips for Dads in Non-Traditional Parenting Arrangements

NORFOLK, Va., June 13, 2013 /PRNewswire/ -- In honor of Father's Day, ValueOptions® , Inc. recognizes that in many American households, dads are the primary caregivers. Whether being a stay-at-home father is a choice or a necessity for a family, both partners can feel impacted by the stigma of assuming non-traditional parental roles. A recently-released study even showed that when men are out-earned by their wives, even the most liberated husband can struggle with mental and physical health issues like anxiety, low libido and insomnia.  

Adjusting to non-traditional parental roles can be challenging and sometimes stressful, but it doesn't have to take a toll on the marital relationship. Here are some tips to help make the arrangement work for everyone:

• Sit down together to decide who will do what: are you buying the kids' clothes? Is your partner expected to cook dinner? Who will be handling the finances? Setting up expectations ahead of time will eliminate unwelcome surprises down the road.
• Check in with each other regularly to see how the arrangement is going, and don't be afraid to adjust something that isn't working. Parenting is filled with trial and error—even if you were following more traditional parental roles, you'd still have missteps.
• Rude comments from others may come up—help each other see the humor in them. Brainstorm creative answers to "So what do you do?" or gentle rebukes to inappropriate questions and comments.
• Utilize online stay-at-home-dad support sites, and explore forming a play group with other fathers and their children. Moms who experience guilt or insecurity about working away from their children can find similar support groups.
• Be patient with each other, especially if the arrangement isn't ideal for one or both of you. Concerns will come up from time to time, so instead of getting defensive, try to hear each other out.
• Remember: a little praise goes a long way! Let your partner know what's going right so you both feel more confident in your roles.
• Make time for date nights to reaffirm your place as each other's partners—not just as parents.

If any aspect of your arrangement becomes too much of a challenge, don't be afraid to speak with a professional. Rich Paul, Senior Vice President, Customer and Product Strategy Officer, suggests putting your health plan to work for your family: "Many workplaces offer employee assistance programs where you can speak with a counselor, or even find alternative child care arrangements. Find out what your benefits are and how you can access them."

For more tips on parenting, relationships and wellness, visit http://www.valueoptions.com/tips-for-dads/

About ValueOptions^®
ValueOptions is a health improvement company that serves more than 32 million individuals. On behalf of employers, health plans and government agencies, we manage innovative programs and solutions that directly address the challenges our health care system faces today. A national leader in the fields of mental and emotional wellbeing, recovery and resilience, employee assistance, and wellness, ValueOptions helps people make the difficult life changes needed to be healthier and more productive. With offices nationwide and a network of more than 130,000 provider locations, ValueOptions helps people take important steps in the right direction. We help them live their lives to the fullest potential. Visit www.valueoptions.com for more information.

SOURCE ValueOptions