NORTHBROOK, Ill., April 11, 2011 /PRNewswire/ -- Most of us don't realize how we thwart our own happily ever after, but author Victoria Fleming, Ph.D., helps people to stop blocking their own fairy tale relationship in her new book, You Complete Me and Other Myths that Destroy Happily Ever After.
People love a good fairy tale, as evidenced by the media frenzy surrounding William and Kate's big day. Yet, according to the US Census Bureau, there is a continuing drop in the total number of married people. How can people be so captivated by the fairy tale and remiss when it comes to their own love and relationships?
According to relationship expert Dr. Victoria Fleming, few people understand what they do to interfere with their happily ever after. "People believe love and marriage is something that happens to them, they don't realize the key role they have in bringing it into their lives and keeping it there." Popular metaphors reinforce this idea. We fall in love. We get swept off our feet. "There is little room for personal responsibility or accountability," says Dr. Fleming, "which sets people up for failure."
You Complete Me is a common myth. "You are trumpeting your own incompleteness, which isn't a great start. You're putting pressure on your partner to exude that quality in order make you complete. And when all is said and done, you usually end up disliking the very quality that brought you together."
Other myths include Marriage Will Change Him, Children Will Bring Us Closer Together, and We Can Go Back to the Way We Were. Dr. Fleming addresses these and other myths in her book, which she refers to as the "ultimate do-it-yourself home-improvement guidebook" because it offers case examples and provides exercises that allow readers to work on their issues in the privacy of their own home. Says New York Times best-selling author Sonia Choquette, "You Complete Me is one of the most realistic, intelligent, grounded, and truly insightful guides ... offering guidance that will make an immediate and profound positive difference in any struggling relationship."
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